Enjoy a daily episode of the following old comedy programs at the H4 header(s) following the list of programs:
Abbott And Costello Amos And Andy An Evening With Groucho Andrew Sisters Andy Griffith Archie Andrews Bill Cosby Bing Crosby Blondie And Dagwood Bob Hope Burns And Allen Command Performance Father Knows Best Jack Benny Jimmy Durante Mail Call Milton Berle Red Skelton The Dean Martin Jerry Lewis Show The Jack Paar Show Voice Of The Army
We have daily episodes of the following detective programs:
Adventures By Morse Boston Blackie Calling All Cars Charlie Chan Dick Tracy Dragnet Hercule Poirot Let George Do It Nero Wolfe Nick Carter Master Detective Perry Mason Philip Marlowe Police Headquarters Sam Spade Secrets Of Scotland Yard Sherlock Holmes Basil Rathbone Sherlock Holmes Smurfmeat That Hammer Guy The Falcon
Daily episodes of the following programs:
Academy Award Theater Authors Playhouse Buck Rogers Campbell Playhouse Cavalcade Of America Encore Theater Family Theater Father Coughlin Ford Theatre Of The Air Hancocks Half Hour Horatio Hornblower Humphrey Bogart Magic Island Mercury Theater- Orson Welles On The Air2 N B C University Theatre Paul Harvey The Rest Of The Story Philco Radio Time Radio City Playhouse Readers Digest Tarzan The Shadow Of Fu Man Chu Words At War
Daily episodes of the following history programs:
A F R S Armed Forced Vietnam Mr. President Soldiers Of The Press Voices History Winston Churchill World War I I Broadcasts You Are There news01
The following great mystery programs:
Black Museum Cloak And Dagger Counterspy Dangerous Assignment Ellery Queen Incredible But True Molle Mystery Theatre Mr. And Mrs. North Murder At Midnight Ripley's Believe It Or Not Secret Agent K7 Spy Catcher The Saint Vincent Price The Shadow The Whistler This Is Your F B I Top Secret True Detective Mysteries
Daily episodes of the outstanding western programs:
Cisco Kid Fort Laramie Gene Autry Gunsmoke Have Gun Will Travel Hopalong Cassidy Roy Rogers Smiley Burnette Tales Of The Texas Rangers The Lone Ranger The Tom Mix Ralston Straightshooters Wild Bill Hickock
A young woman who submitted the tech support message below (about her relationship with her husband) presumably did it as a joke. Then she got a reply which was way too good to keep to herself. The tech support people's love advice was hilarious and genius!
THE QUERY
Dear Tech Support
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as: NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and House cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.
Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
Signed, Desperate.
The response (that came weeks later out of the blue)
Dear Desperate,
First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Please enter command:
Ithoughtyouloved me.HTML
and try to download Tears 6.2
Do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications
Jewelry2.0
and Flowers 3
However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband
1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1.
Please note that
Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta version. Whatever you do, DO NOT, under any circumstances, install
Mother-In- Law 1.0 as it runs a virus in the background that will
eventually seize control of all your system resources. In
addition, please,
do not attempt to re-install the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend: Cooking 3.0.
Good Luck!
What you don't see with your eyes, don't invent with your mouth. Yiddish proverb